You may have read our blog post here on One Tough Job about managing stress during the pandemic, and that’s often all that people think about when they think of mental health.

Stress is acute and difficult, so it makes sense that there is a big focus on that. However, there are many elements to supporting your mental health. Just like the doctor tells us to take care of ourselves in order to avoid getting sick, there’s somewhat the same idea of taking good care of our brains and hearts to better weather the storms that come with mental health challenges. This is a big topic, so these are not the only suggestions – let us know some of your ideas in the comments!

Remember that mental health has many factors

Oftentimes, advice for better mental health puts a lot of strain on the individual parent or family to “fix” how they feel. It’s not that simple! You can’t be expected to control the stress that can come from your employer, your family, or sorting out family finances – many things that affect our mental health are not under our sole control. Take a moment to appreciate the things that are in your control, and take a deep breath to release yourself from feeling guilty about things you cannot control. We won’t tell you that healing and mental health is an entirely individual responsibility, and oftentimes acknowledging that some things are beyond us can be much more soothing than being self-critical and wondering why we haven’t “figured everything out yet.” So let’s focus on the aspects we can change.

Have device-free time

This one helps all members of the family, from kids playing games on iPads to parents checking email or social media on their phones. For better sleep, put away children’s screened devices at least one hour before bedtime (and do this with your laptop/phone/tablet as well!). If your household has a TV, try setting aside times where the TV is completely turned off, not just on mute, so that everyone gets a break from sensory overstimulation. As a parent, if you have a smartphone, consider which apps you can remove and which notifications you can turn off – studies have shown that the less we engage with our phones, the more we feel present in the moment, and the less stressed and hyperactive we feel.

Go outside

Fresh air will turn almost any day around. Even when it’s snowing, even when it’s April showers here in Massachusetts. Bundle up, bundle up your children, and take a short walk even if it’s around the block where you live. Play “I Spy” with your child and see if you can notice any signs of nature – sparrows and squirrels very much count! If you’re fortunate enough to go for a solo walk, try to refrain from checking your phone and take the time to take in the sounds, whether it’s birds chirping or corner store chitchat. Being present in the moment helps us feel more grounded. If you have a backyard, sitting in the backyard while your children play there can also be a good way to get fresh air.

Move your body

Whether you’re working at a computer desk, bending over and down in a nail salon, or standing all day at the grocery store checkout, there’s probably aspects of your job and daily life that have you doing the same motions over and over. According to your own body’s needs and mobility, try some gentle stretching. If you have a tennis ball or lacrosse ball, you can gently massage tight muscles yourself. Holding less tension in our bodies is a great way to help improve our mental state; it’s all connected!

Practice gratitude

Being grateful doesn’t change all of our circumstances, and we don’t expect it to do so. However, it does help us to notice the sweet, wonderful things we might not have recognized before. With a gratitude practice, it helps to start small and keep it regular. For example, every morning or every evening consider 2-3 things you are grateful for. They do not have to be big or important—being grateful that you know how to make your own cup of coffee is absolutely worth being grateful for. Notice how your mood changes if you find even one thing to be excited about each day.